No regrets, just experiences.

Are you free?

How important is freedom?

Can we have too much freedom?

What would you risk for more freedom? 

We all have our value systems.  As a species we have developed countless value system.  Some of these have been specifically encoded and religiously enforced, and some are never consciously recognised nor alternatives considered.  For most people freedom means the freedom to dictate.  The financial freedom to dictate the labor of others, the political freedom to dictate behaviours of others, the social freedom to dictate norms of others, the religious freedom to dictate the religions of others.  Most people have no idea what freedom is.



I hold freedom in a very high regard.  If there is a judgement on my final day may it merely be that my life helped preserve, and improve, the free will of man.  We are all born with a gift from the Divine, the opportunity to become conscious creators.  It is a terrible gift once realised, the Original Sin.  We may choose to disobey the Order imposed on us, and tempt judgement and consequence.  Sin is the Science and Art of causing Change to occur in conformity with Will.  The use of our gifts of Free Will is always risky, the sacrifice that must be made to use our terrible power.  Neither Order nor Chaos improve our freedom alone.  They must be correctly balanced to maximise our freedom.  Modern society is dominated by Order.  We live regimented lives, existing to serve the whims of our employer and government.  Our Owners.  There may be a few exceptions to this reality, but currently authoritarian order dominates Free Will of Man.  This is an affront to our divine gifts, so we develop coping mechanisms to suppress our nature.

Beatniks, Hippies, Punks, Hipsters, etc… just different manifestations of the same thing. Each differentiated more by the secondary symptoms such as method of dress, common ideals, and rhetoric then by the actual environmental factors of their time and place that produce the given sub-culture.  Not because we seek approval from a specific sub-culture, but because we all grew out of a similar culture. We were raised by culture very different from that experienced by the generations before us, and thus produces trends that have superficial differences from the counter-culture of the past. The love of thrift stores is not faddish materialism, it’s anti-materialism. It is a trend that developed across the nation from a generation disenfranchised by materialism, commercialism, sweat shops, and landfills. Sure a handful of hipster elitists materialise and fetishize the trend, but that does not invalidate the genuine grassroots counter-culture that has defined a generation.  It's a coping mechanism. 

A common threat of all counter-culture is hate and distrust of Police.  This hatred of police comes from their new identification with a repressed minority. Though not likely to be completely conscious, their actions demonstrate a failure of the myth of authority. After disillusionment with authority comes disdain. Rebellion becomes self-reinforcing when people begin to identify more and more with the oppressed and lose their identification with any authority figures. Many waves have crashed on the shore, but eventually critical mass is reached and Order is dissolved in an Orgy of Chaos that consumes the freedom Order allows.  This occurs frequently on a personal basis, sometimes on a national basis, and is now poised to consume the very Eye of Authority. 

There exists a Western Banking Empire, the foundation of Western Economic Influence around the world, and subsequently (#2) government influence. Unless you deny the global influence of major financial institutions, and obvious corruption of political leaders at all levels by the existing monetary monarchy.  Our current civilisation is a creation of this Empire.  The Western Banking Empire is responsible for modern civilisation in the way a parent is responsible for their child.  Creation is not ownership.  Free Will is beyond ownership.  Authority was never granted to deny the return of The King.

Many of us knowingly serve the Empire, some consciously, some unknowingly, some for personal benefit, some who believe it is the lesser evil.  Particularly as Americans we are servants to the serpents of this Financial Empire.  We can not see the corrupt fruit we bare because conflict of interest is much more insidious than that. The sweat shops, factory farms, oil spills, war, poverty, and other injustices are cloaked with ignorance.  Most people are typically not conscious of their prejudice and warped perspective, after all we are members of a culture that perpetuates itself by actually believing the BS we're being sold. But it is just BS. Exponential growth can not continue in a finite world. 

Our current crisis is a debt crisis. It's consumer debt, it's sovereign debt, it's corporate debt, you name it. The whole usury scheme assumes exponential increase in wealth. Once things turn around, and start flat-lining, or declining, servicing the debts become a major drain on the economy at all levels. A drain that mostly supports major financial institutions. Sure there are plenty of 99% people with a stake, such as 401k, treasuries, bonds, and the like, but these are crumbs of a cake we can no longer afford to dump so much productivity into. When the debts finally evaporate, and they will, we can go back to producing labor for wealth instead of producing labor for debt.

Of course no Imperial wants their debt derivatives to fail. There are many stakeholders in our debt-based monetary/financial structures that don't want to see it all evaporate, but there's no more room on the etch a sketch. It's time to shake it and start over again. A great many people will loose a lot of wealth they thought they had... on paper, but once the dominoes of debt rebellion start to fall who's going to care about their credit rating over immediate needs? The debts must be written off because they can't get blood from a stone. These debts will disappear once we stop believing in them. 

We may step back from the real/not real, valid/not valid, fact/fiction dualities and realise that we are each weaver of our own myth just like all the other Wizards. I weave imagination into the fabric of observation in order to create a map of reality. Is it 100% correct? No. The map is not the territory. No map can be the territory. That’s not even the point.  This is story telling, just like any historian or anti-historian. Any validity in this rhetoric hinges on personal interpolation of the metaphors. Every truth is based on a thousand lies, and every lie is based on a thousand truths.

“Myth is much more important and true than history. History is just journalism and you know how reliable that is.” ― Joseph Campbell

There is a revolution going on right now, but this revolution must happen without direction. I'm not here to tell people what to do, or what to think. Anyone may know that they have THE light of Truth, but if you start shining it in people's faces you will only encourage defensiveness. Telling people what the truth is, is infringing on their right to Free Will. But as the world changes, more and more people will be kicked out of their simple world-view and be looking for a world-view that better explains their observed reality.  My task is to be there when they decide to look. To trail-blaze a path for others to find. Encourage the conditions for the revolution, but not impose expectations on the world. To act without acting. To do what is right for me, not to lecture others on what's right for them.  The music is already playing. I'm not trying to beat the drums to my own tune, I'm learning to sync myself to the rhythm that is already playing. To resonate with the theme that feels best for me and to be a part of the music.

I made sacrifices for my freedom.  I joined the military and learned what freedom was.  I've walked away from 3 very good jobs since then as an expression of freedom.  My financial well being has been significantly harmed by this process, but I move forward.  I do what I think is right at the time and follow the path it takes me.  No regrets, just experiences. 

Yule-time half-draft.

It's almost Yule-time again.  2011 was a great year for us and we hope your's was too.  Faced with unrelenting economic challenges we write our story of high adventure, struggle, and growth as a family.  We've spent this year adjusting to our new realities quite well, considering where we now find ourselves.  Although there's no telling what 2012 will have in store for us, we have faith in our family and trust to our fate. 

Elysia is now in Second grade and already an amazing person, though we may be biased.  It seems every day we're reminded that she's growing up to be the kind of intelligent and empathetic person with a mind of her own. Egan has preschool once a week, and he loves it.  It might be the only thing right now that he'd rather do then play video games.  Roslynn is a princess.  Beautiful and evil.  Despite many efforts to the contrary she's still able to push her brother and dad around like a spoiled princess. 

We march on into 2012, into uncertain times knowing that it's the struggle that shapes us.  A life of security and luxury is a false ideal.  We can see that in practice it only creates insecurity and emptiness.  Our worth can't be measured by our financial insecurities.  What we do is worth it because it's our story.  The narrative of growth is defined by adversity.  An investment in Character that pays richer then sacrifices to Mammon.  The path may not always seem apparent, so we walk with faith and good will to all.

Merry Solstice & Happy New Year!

Whatever the fates have in store for us.

Hello,

I'm a father, a veteran, a husband, a worker, an American, and a dreamer.  Things were going quite well for our family about 2007.  I had a good job, and we bought our first house.

Our house was $233k when we bought it, a fixer-upper in a Hispanic neighborhood, but it was perfect for us. 

Today it's worth about $145K, not considering the massive dry rot, mold damage, and tens of thousands of dollars in other major cosmetic issues.  Thats a $22K/year loss. 

During that time pressures in the job market drove me from a $72K/year job to $45K/year, a $27K/year loss. 

During this time our household share of the National Debt has went from $190K to $260K, a $17.5K/year loss.

I'm not going to go into why I believe the banks to be significantly responsible for our nation's, and my, economic collapse.  In hindsight it's easy to see the Usury and Political Corruption at the heart of our economic system, but I was an American Dreamer.  I'm not asleep anymore.  I've been rudely awaken to a Brave New World Reality, and I know nothing.  I have many suspicious.  These suspicions don't enlighten the sure path, they obfuscate the very idea of security.  I was tossed out of Plato's Cave and observed an apocalyptic world full of Zombies and Chaos.  But what is to be done?

"Be the change you want to see." ~Mahatma Gandhi

After the 2008 TARP fiasco I felt morally obliged to exercise civil disobedience against the banks, but what can a family man do?  Frustrated with Macro-Economic issues I viewed my own economic niche with a new cynicism.  Our national blight has been caused by those who fail to speak truth to power, and I would no longer be responsible for selling out my truth.  I placed my job on the line for what I thought was right, and found myself unemployed.  The decision to strategically default on the house became compulsory when I was left Jobless and without any income besides Food Stamps.  The knowledge that my 401K would also hemorrhage money and fail well before my retirement and a desire exercise an act of rebellion against Bank of America, gave me purpose, but not solutions. 

There was no telling how long we could keep our home, but we could still survive on my income if we didn't have to pay a mortgage (or student loan, or credit cards).  I no longer have any faith or good will towards a banking system of debt enslavement that has taken over our nation.  I felt no moral obligation to repay printed money with my labor.  My moral obligation is to fight back against the enslavement of my people, my family, my nation, the entirety of life as we know it. 

 "I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies. Already they have raised up a monied aristocracy that has set the government at defiance. The issuing power (of money) should be taken away from the banks and restored to the people to whom it properly belongs." — Thomas Jefferson

I don't regret the path I've taken, and I don't begrudge the toll I've paid.  I will follow the Hero's Journey wherever it leads.  The best I can do is what I think is right at the time.  Regret is only for those who think they can change the past.  My experience grows with each new adventure.  Losing often teaches better then winning.  I've lost a couple of skirmishes but the real Great Struggle hasn't even started yet.  I've sacrificed my family's security with a gesture that would appear to be totally inconsequential to the Great Struggle, but it's what I had to give and I gave it freely without expectation.  I will bear it.  Whatever the fates have in store for us.

"The future is up for grabs. It belongs to any and all who will take the risk and accept the responsibility of consciously creating the future they want." — Robert Anton Wilson

Cynical Agnosticism

I don't know how the world works, no one does. The only constant is chaos. Many fain comprehension of methods of madness, but any who claim comprehension are insane. Anything anyone can think they know of Humanity and the Universe we find ourselves in is an ignorant belief. Some beliefs are more informed by observation then others, but reality has a complexity well beyond the comprehension of any single mind. So how do we navigate the chaos without a perfect map? We work off maps we know to be untrue, but functional. Most Christians don't actually believe 100% of the narrative, many don't actually believe in most of it, but it's a narrative, a map, to a good life and a good society. However, beliefs cause people to feel the need to exterminate any different perspective in order to validate their own.

"...belief is the death of intelligence." ~RAW



So is it possible to function without belief? How do we navigate without a working map? The Scientific Dictatorship of the Future would have us give up personal navigation. The narrative of the greater good (according to a vetted elite) would effectively be transmitted to individual by the machines. The lack of diversity and the inbred group-think in such a society would create instabilities that we can easily see in the world today. We're blinded by our beliefs, we can't see what's right in front of our eyes yet we march proudly on. There is no way to know what we can't perceive, and no way to perceive the turbulent nature of chaotic interaction. The Chaos of Anons.




"We have long known that the objects of our palpable sense experiences can be influenced by choice—both conscious choice and unconscious. This is a demonstrated fact that does not require that we believe some force within us reaches out and touches the universe. I address a pragmatic relationship between belief and what we identify as "real." All of our judgements carry a heavy burden of ancestral beliefs to which we of the Bene Gesserit tend to be more susceptible than most. It is not enough that we are aware of this and guard against it. Alternative interpretations must always receive our attention." ~Mother Superior Taraza: Argument in Council


The real problem comes in with how our beliefs cause our realities. I belief this to be true on a metaphysical level, but it can be easily observed without invoking extra-reality explanations. Belief in any particular idea tends to cause the observation of said idea. Belief in Republican ideology tends to cause a world viewed with a republican narrative (Same for Dems, there's just a bit more diversity in the narrative). A belief in the fundamental goodness of man will lead to seeing the best in strangers. A belief in moral law leads to an imposition of criminal law. Belief in an authoritarian God leads to the formation of an authoritarian government. Our myths form our perspective, our lies form our real world.

It is then my belief that our salvation is cynical agnosticism. Nothing is real, but something is real. Any one idea is BS, but everything is BS. We live in our BS, but there's nothing we can do to escape an underlying emptiness to any belief. The fullness of life is to be found, not in a House of Cards, but in experience and perception. The House of Cards is how we shape our experience and perception. It's important, but not sacred. Beliefs are real, because they shape reality, but they're not creating the reality you want... then it's time to change your beliefs.

This is the awe-inspiring universe of magic: There are no atoms, only waves and motions all around. Here, you discard all belief in barriers to understanding. You put aside understanding itself. This universe cannot be seen, cannot be heard, cannot be detected in any way by fixed perceptions. It is the ultimate void where no preordained screens occur upon which forms may be projected. You have only one awareness here — the screen of the magi: Imagination! Here, you learn what it is to be human. You are a creator of order, of beautiful shapes and systems, an organiser of chaos." ~The Atreides Manifesto

A new reality

All media is propaganda, and all propaganda is an attempt at mind control. Manipulate reality by manipulating minds. The Art is real, and it is important. There's millions of robots out there. What would they do without programing? Become sentient because they lack other programing? No, they will find ANY other programing to run on. There's the more individualized programing, and there's the social engineering programing.

The actions often do not align with the rhetoric, but how can we know what another's conscious thoughts are? What his programing is? If he is individual programed, who did it, and are they programed? Most likely. And are their programmers programed? Most likely. It's also called culture. We have conscious cultural motivations and unconscious. Manipulating these has been reduced to a science (although it is an art) but that doesn't mean the programmers are in control. It only means they're trying to control, they're all still victims of their own programing and prejudices. Suspicions, observations, and intuition.

We can not all just ignore the subjective nature of reality, and pretend those who fit our truth/belief structure are the true arbiters of objective truth. All media is propaganda. "Scholarly" is just another defunct belief structure rooted in the elitist ideology that only the perspective of the properly educated/indoctrinated matters.

This is bullshit propaganda.

Because it's propaganda. Problem, reaction, solution. It's an artificial problem, with an intended solution.

I see the "Grand Conspiracy" as being the "Great Work" of the Masons, and other mystical cults. It's not a material plan as much as a vague idea, a path. There are many different factions trying to manifest the idea, but there's lots of competition between them. The reason we are not there yet is because we have not yet imagined how to get there yet. The internet is accelerating the sharing of imaginations. Any new reality must be born of our imagination, the seat of The Creator. We are creating a new reality.

Nuclear 6 Sigma & Quality Half-truth

I've always dealt with lots of quality and process controls. There's no process control like starting up nuclear reactors, and no inspections like ORSE (Operational Reactor Safeguards Exam); but I've also dealt with a number of corporate QMSs (Quality Management System). Everyone hates the extra overhead caused by Quality Management, but end customers expect it. ISO standardization requires most manufacturing corporations to maintain massive process and quality records, Naval Reactors required massive process and quality records. However, I doubt there is much in the world that matches the attention to detail required to train on, maintain, operate, calibrate, and repair the Instrumentation and Control electronics. It is my experience that most corporations treat their QMSs more like a Red-Headed Stepchild (RHS) then a Golden Child. Record-keeping becomes a labor overhead and excessive chances for documenting errors. The motions are carried out only to satisfy the needs of the RHS, with little regard for any actual value the stepchild adds. After all, stepchildren are to be seen not heard. Quality Control is to be seen, not practiced.

There plenty of valid reasons this is so. In practice QMSs do tend to be excessive labor overhead and where errors are caught or made-up. If our training records did not display near-perfect, but not too perfect, matching of experience to exam scores, it was a hit against us in ORSE. When records are expected to be perfect, they must be maintained with a detachment from reality. I had to write exams that would make expected measurements. Good, but not too good. Creative grading was sometimes used in order to generate desired records. Such qualitative measurements can easily be massaged. Records must match expectations. This rarely takes the form of blatant record falsification, the testing is adjusted, the data is massaged, the truth is hidden under a fabric of half-truth.

I know how to hide reality under a fabric of half-truth, but more importantly I know how it is done. QMSs like Six Sigma strive for a statistical certainty of improvement, yet in practice companies see only extra overhead and micromanaging. I'm familiar with how Quality Control fails everyone, but I'm also familiar with how it can be correctly used. Obviously passing ORSE is not the sole purpose of nuclear reactor maintenance records and QMSs has more value then obtaining an ISO certification.

My new company lacks the bureaucracy, institutionalization, and corporate death-traps of QMS that my previous company had. As I work through my training on equipment unlike any I've worked on before, I am going to work on improving the training documentation and control. I am going to try and use my experience to find the most helpful balance of documentation and control vs. audit traps and labor overhead. I suspect that there will be plenty of opportunity to take on these tasks, without trampling on the toes, egos, and jobs of others. There's not much chance that I'll make up the lost income of my job transition, but when you see past the half-truth of monetary gain and instead measure career growth by experience and opportunity, I still feel I am on an excellent path.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

2010 has been a year of trials for our family. After starting the year out freshly unemployed, we explored many different career options. We dedicated one bedroom to growing oyster mushrooms for profit, but found no one wanted to eat food grown on trash. Grammy help us out a whole lot, and helped me get work building a website for a friend of hers, but when it was done so was the work. Eventually I found work with Disco, a Japanese company that manufactures more then 80% of the world’s semiconductor dicers, grinders, and polishers. I will be the Laser Saw expert for Intel.

We spent most of the year without any income, but never went without. Whenever we were down to our last dime, something always came through. We were without health insurance, but never needed it. We learned how to adapt, and trust to fate. We’ve learned to trust our luck much more then in the old days.

Brandy and I built our own website (www.Life-Wharton.com) in order to house our creative ideas and hopefully make a few bucks. Although we’ve yet to take in enough profit to cover operating costs, we intend to keep the website up as a repository for our creativity and a way to explore mystical experience (If you’ve never had one you should). As time passes our website will grow and change with us. It is a reflection of ourselves in the virtual world. Our family’s foothold in the web, sharing ourselves with the world.

Elysia (6) started 1st grade this year, and has started attending Girl Scouts. Three years ago she made the decision she was a vegetarian, I figured it was a phase that she would soon forget about. Three years later, and she still takes her vegetarianism very seriously. We are so incredibly proud of her self-confidence and commitment to what she feels is right for her. She has experienced much more judgment and ridicule from classmates, friends and family, then I ever thought such a young child could bare. I don’t understand why people take such offense to her decision, but her steadfastness on her beliefs has been an inspiration to us.

Egan (4) discovered the Xbox this year, and has been great at getting his chores done ever since. He’s always been such a laid back guy, punishments never seemed to have much impact. We’d tell him to go to time-out, and he’d just go like he was planning on doing that anyway. If we ever spanked him, he would retreat inward and anything we said after word was met with glassy eyes. But we threaten to take the Xbox away... he’s all ears and will do whatever it takes.

Roslynn (2) is a Honey butt. The sweetest, most caring little girl, except when she’s not. Egan is often on the receiving end of her evil side. She knows just how to push him around, and he never shows any aggression back. He knows that you never hit a girl. Even when we’re playing and I play boxing with them, he’ll say “Stop dad! You don’t hit girls”. Unfortunately Roslynn has yet learned to reciprocate. When she gets a time-out for hitting her brother, we tell her she needs to apologize, normally she refuses and we have to send her back to time-out. She’s spent a considerable amount of time in the corner on a number of occasions before she was willing to let go of her stubbornness. She even spent a few weeks refusing to leave time-out if she felt she was sent there unfairly.

The road of life has taken us many places and yet there is so much more to explore. We are thankful for every moment we have together and for everyone who shares our journey with us.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Jason, Brandy, Elysia, Egan and Roslynn Jay